Saturday, April 11, 2009

Men and Women

So it has happened before that I have been accused of not liking men. . . well, of even being a hater'. In fact, Date 8 made a statement to this effect. (Sorry, don't remember what I said to make him say it, but I think it was a reference to men being simple (not stupid, people, simple.) Yes, I understand that I need to filter what I say a little better, but that isn't the point of this post, so move on.

I love men. I think men are great. I am charmed by them, sometimes because they are so very different from women. I appreciate that they need us (women) to just tell them what we want and think without putzing around with hints or inuendos.

Sure, I have dogs, friends and batteries (sorry Mom, don't think about that one) which does make the uses I have for men more limited, but that doesn't mean that I like them any less. It doesn't mean that I don't yearn for someone to put gas in my car, take the trash out, kill the bugs and upon occasion take me out and make me feel special.

(Yes, there are more reasons, and, sure, I could get sappy and into all of that, but that's not what this is about, so again, let's move on.)

I am not a romantic. I do not have a two hour movie in my head of the magic that is marriage. I'm surrounded by women I adore that remind me on an almost daily basis that cohabitating is a lot more difficult than most people are willing to admit and there are many reasons to be worried about making it work successfully.

I would love to find a guy that is totally crazy about me and about whom I would be equally crazy; a guy whose company I totally enjoy and with whom I would like to spend days and nights.

But, more generally, I want to say again. I love men for their simplicity and straightforwardness, and simplicity is beautiful. I love that they are linear thinkers (most of the time.) I love that they don't tend to be burdened with terribly complicated, fraught with drama relationships. Let's face it, when they get mad at a friend, it is a simple affair.

"Hey Jackass, you pissed me off."
"What ever Asshole."
Scene ends. Fight

How is it that the world has managed to make the things that I love most about men the thing that makes the world think I don't? Why do I feel as if I am stating some taboo thought when I comment on this basic difference between men and women; as if their simplicity and straightforwardness is a bad thing. We have magazines devoted to making life more simple. We constantly struggle to simplify our lives. These are good things.

Speaking of which, today during a quick run to Target with the BFF, we nabbed Real Simple (Ooohhhh, I do so love that magazine.) The first page has this quote on it.

"What I expect from my male friends is that they are polite and clean. What I expect from my female friends is unconditional love, the ability to finish my sentences for me when I am sobbing, a complete and total willingness to pour their hearts out to me, and the ability to tell me why the meat thermometer isn't supposed to touch the bone." Anna Quindlen, Living out Loud

I love this. Again, please note, lower expectations for men, high expectations for women. I could probably be more eloquent on the topic and perhaps more insightful, but I'm hanging with the BFF, chatting, listening to children run about and just not able to focus too well. So, this is what you get.

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