Saturday, June 23, 2012

Silence is Golden

So I’ve started dating again. My theory is that I really can’t start getting over the last one until I can date enough to feel like I’ve moved on. Which is all well and good, except that I don’t want to talk about it. Really, to be honest I don’t want to even think about it. At all.  I just want to do it. Historically speaking, I am a talker, which makes this a rather new and different experience for me. It’s mildly weird because I am used to talking about it, but it’s also nice. No one asks me any questions. THAT part. I really, really like.

I just don’t want to think or talk about any of it. Not the “I have a date,” not the “I’m getting ready to go on the date,” not the “this is how the date went,” or the “now I’m done with that guy, no I’m not dating him again,” and if there is a stray chance of a second or third date (hahahaha) I don’t want to think about “why I like him” or “why it might or might not work out.”

Dating is exhausting, and, quite frankly, a bit of a pain in the ass. As much as guys whine about paying for dinner…the whole process of making sure one is presentable and in a relatively good mood to make bullshit conversation for an evening…takes a lot of energy. Energy I don’t have currently.

So, I’m not talking about dating. Mostly, I’m pretending that I’m not dating. I rather like it this way. So, I’m exercising my need to think about it here, and nowhere else. 

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